Its late in the night, and I'm just back after explaining in detail - the - Most vivacious and searched for features in a girl they should search for me. My marriage has become the central theme of my - Life these days ...and from - The tall mountains, to the dry plains, from the dusky villages, to the Tribal zones, marriage - Of - Prakul -- offcourse not me ..... is ringing more often than the Church Bell itself.
I live a life of a monk. Disconnecting and connecting with people like - cheese does with sandwich. Chewed from all the corners, trying to uplift a few in pain, but the more - I travel ahead in this mystery of life, the more - enlightened and more confused I keep growing - of What lies ahead.
Is what I feel bad - actually bad, or what I feel good actually good ? This question - keeps haunting me - When I try and differentiate between - Those I call friends, and Those huge lots - I mention to be my foes.
For instance, take this question of buying a new vehicle - I keep going to all these - Car websites of India - Whose very names shall confuse you - if you are searching for a car --- or for a girl - to get married or settled with --- lets see:
- cardekho dot com
- carwale dot com
- carazoo dot com
- gaadi dot com
and to cut it short - a whole lot of bunch of all such - wonder car sellers.
Reading the reviews shall give you a headache ------ not because - the reviews are not good or whatever -
- You'll be spoofed to one corner of the room - Ki bhai - NRI bandey kya English boltey hai ... and to top it - Kya zabardast likhtey hai
- How one gentleman went to the top of a mountain - in the Car --- which was actually his test drive .... to the level - it Was his purchased vehicle --- Alas ! He was not given any test drive
- How one person - asks - all other - Readers to keep away from Such cars - as He thinks - after keeping sucha thing for 10 years of his life - He was doped into doing this .... Usne apne prayashchit ka tarika .... Yeh Nikala - mein Teen ke dibbe se dil laga loonga ....10 years ke liye --- Is this emotionalism ...ahead of Nationalism ...?
Alas, I went in for a reel - when I read this. And I plan - ya to main - Ab car kharidne ki Kwahish ko - Ab - Ek khoobsoorat chadar pehna ke - kamrey ke ek kone mein rakh doon.... Ya - the second thought that crosses my Mind - ki - mujh jaise - Ladke ---jo Gaadi ko dekh kar - daure khane lagtey hai ---
Unhe unke sasur - Shaadi - ke us atyant gamasan evam bhayankar mahaul - mein - Aur bhi - chaukaa dene ke liye Kehtey hai - 'Manyavar - Ladki - ko le jaa rahe ho. Suck se rakhogey. Ek kaam aur karo - Is gaadi ko bhi apna lo.....' and the boy feels - 'Ladki - abhi saari sabzi katwaegi ... poortey mall ko lootne ke plan banwaegi ----- aur jab mein in sab Iraadon mein na-kamyaab ho chuka hounga - To phir - Apki yeh - Lohe ki saugaat - Mujhe - Mere ardhsatya - se door - Poorna Satya - ki or bhej degi' ..... kya hai woh satya -
"Lohe ki gaadi pe lohe ka ghoda hai" "Khoon iske jism mein bacha bahut thoda hai" "Jisko chalana ho ghode ko lohe ko" "laat maro kheech ke - Yeh ! bin pende ka katora hai" ....
Now the punch,
"Ek poorana e-mail - aj kai din baad - Mail box - mein bhatakta hua aa jata hai" - likha hai
- "Mai apki itni ijjat karti hoon - ki maine apse baat karna chod diya n to top it up - Meri shaadi ab jaldi hi honey wali hai" - "Aur isi liye maine apse yeh jhoot nahi bola" - "meri shaadi honey wali hai" ...... and hence "Mai jitney logon ki ijjat karti hun - Mera matlab hota hai - Ki ab hamari kabhi baat nahin hogi - aur isse bhi bada matlab hai - ki mai jo Shaadi kar rahi hun" .... Uski ijjat ab mere haath mein hai ????
Today, I don't want to philosophisize over this ? People do what they want to do. Blame n number of factors for what didn't happen with them. Curse the Devil ... and Praise God - for every pain and pleasure - respectively - they undergo ..... But - in all this while - in their circle - of - Broken Faith - and Tilted Humanity - they never understand - That this guy or girl keeps calling me names, keeps calling my number, keeps calling my Box - not because he/she is not like my arrogant cousins who mis-behave with me, not like my own Uncles who never correspond with me, not like my lost friends - who never bother if I'm alive - but, he wants that circle of my attention, in which I live - alone - With my pains, my loneliness and my scarifices. People forget - that we - Mis-interpret those - who keep sending us signals - and start interpreting a world - instead - that doesn't exists. In, the mall I see a girl - she smiles at me. I smile at her. I ask her phone, I see her off. When two weeks pass - I'm trying for a new number. I often ponder - can - Love be there - at places - Relationships are in the form of lust and disgust, in the form of hungry waiters looking at you, or in the parks where - The Battered Policeman - Is Searching for A Bench - to warm his butt. In India - its a big mis-understanding - That love marriages - and love affairs are - in tune or hype. Largely - love in India - is that war between the stomach and the desire - that - lonely boys and girls, unattended males and females fight on a daily basis. And it is not incorrect to say - In India - people only love their own self, because beyond them - They have a Stone .... A Statue - A Tomb or a Cold Desert Valley on High Hills --- because such things never ask for anything, they have no emotions, they cannot breathe, they cannot sympathize. They atmost what they can do is - Give nothing to the people - Who can give nothing to the Gods. Myth and reality - never share the same ground. Lust and love can never go together.
The only question I could have asked this girl ever would have been - "Don't you think - we can together make a difference to this Town we live in, To this country we owe, to the people I call my brothers ????" but, I'm sure - if I had done that - She would have answered - I can't love a something in Flesh n Bone - I'm doomed to love stones, I'm dooned to love statues, I'm doomed to love the deserts ..... and the best part - When I couldn't do anything to feed my hunger - I called Hunger - my nature. I started to praise Hunger. I sang some songs in hunger so hard - that my child died without milk or biscuit, but because - His death - was inadvertently his destiny - I continue - to ask the Stone in me - when shall we meet in Heaven.
I might have written certain things, that might not appeal to a few people. Becasue I know, for them God is in the non-living, dead and metamorphosized. But, for me - God is all around me - Inside me in my brain. Inside me in my tongue. Inside me in my soul. I don't ditch people for God. I don't ditch God for devil. And, I never ditch - The devil for destiny.
If man was perfect - why couldn't - he replicate a moon till date. If man was imperfect - why is Taj Mahal - the centre of atttraction of the world ??
If man is human - Why can't he hold the hand of people - Who need him, instead of - Crying before stone, that would eventually - Give them - Scratches .............
And, today - I don't have any pictures to post. Because - Now, life for me - shall move - beyond - the - Outer Crust ................ Good People are not just those - Who are good looking - This is Myth ....
Love and Regards,
Urs Beloved PM - The great Punctured Tyre...
whoa - keep coming back ...
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