The Night Looks Darker Today. The Moon Seems - More Grey.

Dear All Punctured Tyres.
Its late in the night, and I'm just back after explaining in detail - the - Most vivacious and searched for features in a girl they should search for me. My marriage has become the central theme of my - Life these days ...and from - The tall mountains, to the dry plains, from the dusky villages, to the Tribal zones, marriage - Of - Prakul -- offcourse not me ..... is ringing more often than the Church Bell itself.
I live a life of a monk. Disconnecting and connecting with people like - cheese does with sandwich. Chewed from all the corners, trying to uplift a few in pain, but the more - I travel ahead in this mystery of life, the more - enlightened and more confused I keep growing - of What lies ahead.
Is what I feel bad - actually bad, or what I feel good actually good ? This question - keeps haunting me - When I try and differentiate between - Those I call friends, and Those huge lots - I mention to be my foes.
For instance, take this question of buying a new vehicle - I keep going to all these - Car websites of India - Whose very names shall confuse you - if you are searching for a car --- or for a girl - to get married or settled with --- lets see:

1. cardekho dot com
2. carwale dot com
3. carazoo dot com
4. gaadi dot com

and to cut it short - a whole lot of bunch of all such - wonder car sellers.

Reading the reviews shall give you a headache ------ not because - the reviews are not good or whatever -

1. You'll be spoofed to one corner of the room - Ki bhai - NRI bandey kya English boltey hai ... and to top it - Kya zabardast likhtey hai
2. How one gentleman went to the top of a mountain - in the Car --- which was actually his test drive .... to the level - it Was his purchased vehicle --- Alas ! He was not given any test drive
3. How one person - asks - all other - Readers to keep away from Such cars - as He thinks - after keeping sucha thing for 10 years of his life - He was doped into doing this .... Usne apne prayashchit ka tarika .... Yeh Nikala - mein Teen ke dibbe se dil laga loonga ....10 years ke liye --- Is this emotionalism ...ahead of Nationalism ...?

Alas, I went in for a reel - when I read this. And I plan - ya to main - Ab car kharidne ki Kwahish ko - Ab - Ek khoobsoorat chadar pehna ke - kamrey ke ek kone mein rakh doon.... Ya - the second thought that crosses my Mind - ki - mujh jaise - Ladke ---jo Gaadi ko dekh kar - daure khane lagtey hai ---

Unhe unke sasur - Shaadi - ke us atyant gamasan evam bhayankar mahaul - mein - Aur bhi - chaukaa dene ke liye Kehtey hai - 'Manyavar - Ladki - ko le jaa rahe ho. Suck se rakhogey. Ek kaam aur karo - Is gaadi ko bhi apna lo.....' and the boy feels - 'Ladki - abhi saari sabzi katwaegi ... poortey mall ko lootne ke plan banwaegi ----- aur jab mein in sab Iraadon mein na-kamyaab ho chuka hounga - To phir - Apki yeh - Lohe ki saugaat - Mujhe - Mere ardhsatya - se door - Poorna Satya - ki or bhej degi' ..... kya hai woh satya -

"Lohe ki gaadi pe lohe ka ghoda hai" "Khoon iske jism mein bacha bahut thoda hai" "Jisko chalana ho ghode ko lohe ko" "laat maro kheech ke - Yeh ! bin pende ka katora hai" ....

Now the punch,

"Ek poorana e-mail - aj kai din baad - Mail box - mein bhatakta hua aa jata hai" - likha hai

- "Mai apki itni ijjat karti hoon - ki maine apse baat karna chod diya n to top it up - Meri shaadi ab jaldi hi honey wali hai" - "Aur isi liye maine apse yeh jhoot nahi bola" - "meri shaadi honey wali hai" ...... and hence "Mai jitney logon ki ijjat karti hun - Mera matlab hota hai - Ki ab hamari kabhi baat nahin hogi - aur isse bhi bada matlab hai - ki mai jo Shaadi kar rahi hun" .... Uski ijjat ab mere haath mein hai ????

Today, I don't want to philosophisize over this ? People do what they want to do. Blame n number of factors for what didn't happen with them. Curse the Devil ... and Praise God - for every pain and pleasure - respectively - they undergo ..... But - in all this while - in their circle - of - Broken Faith - and Tilted Humanity - they never understand - That this guy or girl keeps calling me names, keeps calling my number, keeps calling my Box - not because he/she is not like my arrogant cousins who mis-behave with me, not like my own Uncles who never correspond with me, not like my lost friends - who never bother if I'm alive - but, he wants that circle of my attention, in which I live - alone - With my pains, my loneliness and my scarifices. People forget - that we - Mis-interpret those - who keep sending us signals - and start interpreting a world - instead - that doesn't exists. In, the mall I see a girl - she smiles at me. I smile at her. I ask her phone, I see her off. When two weeks pass - I'm trying for a new number. I often ponder - can - Love be there - at places - Relationships are in the form of lust and disgust, in the form of hungry waiters looking at you, or in the parks where - The Battered Policeman - Is Searching for A Bench - to warm his butt. In India - its a big mis-understanding - That love marriages - and love affairs are - in tune or hype. Largely - love in India - is that war between the stomach and the desire - that - lonely boys and girls, unattended males and females fight on a daily basis. And it is not incorrect to say - In India - people only love their own self, because beyond them - They have a Stone .... A Statue - A Tomb or a Cold Desert Valley on High Hills --- because such things never ask for anything, they have no emotions, they cannot breathe, they cannot sympathize. They atmost what they can do is - Give nothing to the people - Who can give nothing to the Gods. Myth and reality - never share the same ground. Lust and love can never go together.

The only question I could have asked this girl ever would have been - "Don't you think - we can together make a difference to this Town we live in, To this country we owe, to the people I call my brothers ????" but, I'm sure - if I had done that - She would have answered - I can't love a something in Flesh n Bone - I'm doomed to love stones, I'm dooned to love statues, I'm doomed to love the deserts ..... and the best part - When I couldn't do anything to feed my hunger - I called Hunger - my nature. I started to praise Hunger. I sang some songs in hunger so hard - that my child died without milk or biscuit, but because - His death - was inadvertently his destiny - I continue - to ask the Stone in me - when shall we meet in Heaven.

I might have written certain things, that might not appeal to a few people. Becasue I know, for them God is in the non-living, dead and metamorphosized. But, for me - God is all around me - Inside me in my brain. Inside me in my tongue. Inside me in my soul. I don't ditch people for God. I don't ditch God for devil. And, I never ditch - The devil for destiny.

If man was perfect - why couldn't - he replicate a moon till date. If man was imperfect - why is Taj Mahal - the centre of atttraction of the world ??

If man is human - Why can't he hold the hand of people - Who need him, instead of - Crying before stone, that would eventually - Give them - Scratches .............

And, today - I don't have any pictures to post. Because - Now, life for me - shall move - beyond - the - Outer Crust ................ Good People are not just those - Who are good looking - This is Myth ....

Love and Regards,

Urs Beloved PM - The great Punctured Tyre...

whoa - keep coming back ...

In the corner of the lounge - they say there is fire - I say - Desire

WHEN WE THINK THE WORLD HAS STOPPED ! THE EARTH IS STILL REVOLVING .................................................................................



PASSING THROUGH A PERSONAL CRISIS OF - INDECISION - WHEN GOD AND SATAN - ARE REVEALING IN EQUAL MEASURES TO ME

I have been a witness to an event when my house turned into a Village - unlike the - Chokhi Dhani or Pind - where people come to believe in Something or Leave behind a legacy - This was a get to gether of Relatives - of al kinds -

1). One's you meet for the first time - and wonder - Why did we meet ??

2). One's you keep meeting thrice a year - And wonder - Do we know each other well ??

3). Third - The one's - Who don't believe - they are relatives - rather they are - Guavas - Which-ever head they fall onto - They are sure to break.

But, there is also one kind - I faced this time - and that was the - list of those - Who - Came and Went - and I lost nothing - except - gratitude and respect for them - for they - Not only did what - relatives are supposed to do, but, I'm sure - they - are the one's - God plans to be our relatives in the next trip (u know hat I mean).....

The vendors are still dawning every second day - not able to get either to ask for the money of whatever services they offered on that day, or asking for forgiveness of their past birth sins they are able to understand for which God - kicked their butts - on the Day - by Raining harsh.

In any case - whatever - this list might translate into - I am very happy to Have Sonal (my sis) go into a home - Where people are well above such petty - Non-Sense issues like the color of the curtain and - Weight of the car .... but they love to go to Puri - every time they get an opportunity - a place from where - The ocean - Sees you large in the eye, and these little fishermen - riding - the waves just as the Soldiers would ride their Patton Tanks...

Neelanchal - this is what the locals of Puri call their little place as - God's have different meaning here. Love a totally different meaning. And colors - You have to be blind to the daily chores befor eGod gives you those eyes to - Go ahead and see - What Orissa is made up of. Food is finger-licking good. People - so nice - they might leave their - Hut for you to relax, the only thing - Don't act over-smart.....

Now the punch line

Inbetween this Tsunami of relatives hovering from everywhere, I was all being tumbled in and out of - Old/Could Be/Would Be - type of relationship scenarios, and then suddenly, this ::::: The eyes - That can kill you, the Sound that can finish you ....and The Saree - its not a Saree Shop - its the big - Women Kent Mall of Bangalore - where every saree is Worth - the people who show it to you - Because they don't sell it to you - They - Give it to you --- Like a gift .....

Mrichika (name changed) - manages the Banquets at a Hotel and - will be getting married in three months from now, and I was shell shocked this beauty in Allahabad - Known more - over - for "Karva Chauth" and "Papad Kheer" kind of parties and all these Kayastha ladies - little over-weight trying to Prove they are still the best (some going over the top - with ugly Tatoos and out-dated hair-styles) - and inbetween this - This lady marmalade - Dancing on the floors of the - Pale - and over whitish hotel at Allahabad. I, as usual - tongue-tied and taking in all the lucid remarks possibly I can get from her and her very poky - kind of colleagues .... Ek azad mard - aur uski chahat ka dar - keval woh hi samajh sakta hai - Mai karta bhi kya .....

I wrote a full bang on letter - and kept in the Pocket - but the rocket - Misfired .....

Today - me and my - Lady Air-Hostess are landing in all different locations as possible. I am in the restaurent - she is in the lobby. I'm raking all over the lobble - She's moved to the counter behind Reception. I'm seeking to reach her at the Lobby Desk - she has left with her - Cell Phone to another - part of the hotel .... and possibly all other staff - searching for an iron stick - to kill - The WIld Beast. ....i wonder

The the dream date happens - When - I alongwith a "Priest in the hotel" and my "Chirpy Friend Ashu" are having Coffee ....and the idea - passes my Head - why not go and see some - Hotel - wahi to dikhayegi !!! wah ....

And, I am out of my seat ---- consoling these two wonderful people besides me .... but Cloud Burst happens when - Instead of the Air-Hostess - I have this - jatt-mix-hindi - (a much more horrid version than Bhojpuri with Awadhi mixed) appears - and tells me - Mai leke chalta hun (I felt - mein yahan se nikalta hun) ... but you know coutesies....

But, when after a 10 minutes halt at the various - Unused rooms of this Hotel - I asked her to come her seat and I needed to talk to her .... Parineeta - And the Dog - Manager are finally upfront. We stare each other - My lips move - as if they'll fall - like the leaves of the old oak, and I ask her - What's Your Story ...? And she says I'm not mad - to be here - in this Crispy town - leaving Delhi - I have not come here without purpose, and I shall not be left alone ... I asked her --- meaning ???? She smoked - 'February - I'm boarding a plane to Rwanda, with a pilot who doesn't knows flying - but off-course - He's - The Flight Minister's - chosen Nephew .... ' alas .....

I - in all my life have never had - This feeling - I was drowning /// I was getting fired - from an AK - 47 and then - Somebody was applying - Amrutanjan Balm on my - Cuts - I didn't cry - and that is what I Did most. I felt like that Pilot - Whose License - has been curbed - mid-air and - He's been asked - to kindly drop out in a parachute ... and that is what I did - excatly .....

November 01, 2010 - will become a historical date in my life - When I lost a someone - I would have never wished to lose ... To - time / Destiny ....or for that Matter ---- those I love even ....

But, God tells you at these moments - I am here - my Child - Dance before me ..... and I feel - I would be doing it now .... My uric acid is well ahead of its metric values and such episodes - might bring in the Mighty Heart and the Crumpy Liver in tango ...and I might be the next - "Most Enlightened and Most Flowered Grave" of the next All Saints Day ......!

THE MOTTO

Go to the Church and look for more - Dull and Ugly - aunts with more Dull and Ugly daughters, they might find you to be the Graviera Mr. India ... or else ----- Marry a - Tamilian (atleast their shall be silence in the house) - Why - tamilians only eat --- They don't talk .....

In any case ...... my purpose of writing such stories is that - people are full of flaws (specially those who believe they are perfect), but this belief that they are perfect ofteb helps them understand theie shortcomings in such a way - That - they start appreciating life not from a Gloden Binocular but froma broken bangle - its still beautiful .....

And a few lines for - My Lost Air - Hostess

Its not a flight, its not a kite,

We can board, we can hold,

But, its a blanket, its a pickle,

We can taste a bit, But still we can fold ............

And feel warm ...

LIFE WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN LIFE IF THESE THINGS WOULD NOT HAVE HAPPENED

SO LET THEM HAPPEN .................

Take Care .... n Keep reading

do leave me comments - they help me move

P - the tyre